The sun is trying to peek out!! I brought nice weather to NYC! – well, sort of:-)

I am about to get ready for showcase. I do have to say: the TV is a terrible thing. Once you are not used to the commercials and such, it can really give you a headache. I can't imagine how people have it on 24/7 because when it's on, I can't even hear myself thinking.

Since I am in a hotel room, I turned it on while I was having a bite to eat, and then had to turn it off stat because my head started ringing.

New York is lovely. There is an energy in the air, which is very addictive. This is the third time I am here in the last six months, and each time I felt stronger and more suited to this place. I want to spend at least a month here soon, performing and exploring. I was born here, in Manhattan. I think soon it will be time for me to come full circle.

I had been looking for the world
between words, pictures and pages
Sometimes tangled up
between the sheets of a hotel room.
Thinking that surely,
I would find it between notes of songs;
melodies yet untested, but willing.

All this time
It was right here
waiting to be discovered.
Closer than my own skin;
brighter than a comet's hope;
always inside its perfect home
of a patient and persevering guide:
my heart.

(eik, nyc – Hudson Hotel, 3/4/10)

I am in bed at Hudson Hotel this morning, and about to get up, get the blood flowing and start the day. I have a showcase this afternoon and then I am performing at show at the intimate Rockwood: I love that place.

The show at the Stronghold was one of the most enjoyable experiences ever, and my best show to date. The White Buffalo who was the headliner was really amazing. I love that venue - the wood, the couches and the overall vibe of it create a very lovely atmosphere.  My graphic artist and designer Missy put together a couple of special outfits for the upcoming shows, as well, and I got to wear one of them to The Stronghold. I'll post some pictures shortly, but let's just say that the theme was wood nymph and I had a lovely arrangement of flowers on my head. It was wonderful. I really look forward to doing more of that sort of thing and seriously getting into the whole spirit of 'dressing the music'.

I loved that outfit so much, I am wearing it to the showcase this afternoon. Picture me traipsing through NYC wearing an all white costume and majestic flowers in my hair: very fun. I could get used to this.

I am performing at Rockwood tonight at 9 PM. For that I shall probably don another costume that's a little more reminiscent of 'the night at the opera' theme. With a headdress to complete the picture. But I could change my mind! I have two to choose from:-)

I am full of energy, happy and excited. Except I wish Missy was here to help me put those flowers on my head! But I shall manage: I am a resourceful Russian.

It is a gray and drizzly day here. Amazing how distinctive NYC energy is. The moment I land in JFK, I can feel its buzz. LA is so muted, compared to this. But I don't mind that – LA has its own gifts for me, too..

and so tonight I am performing a set at The Stronghold on Abbot Kinney, opening for The White Buffalo. Come say hi and spend some quality time with me:-)

Two weeks ago I played at this benefit for Haiti. We had a surprise guest – Jackson Browne. He sang a song 'All Good Things Must Come To An End'. Or at least I think it was the title, but it was about that. It moved me to tears that night, because it made me think of my mom back in Moscow who I have not seen forever, it seems, and the relentless passage of time. Today was a beautiful rainy day – it started out sleepy and off center, because I overslept grievously, but tea and a furious bike ride over puddles, while the sun kept battling the clouds, put me to the rights.

Upon my return, though, I was given a month's notice for the room I have been renting.. My landlord and his fiance are going to be remodeling the house. Time to go. Mind you, it has been a lovely place to live and I am grateful for the opportunity. Yet when I found out, I felt a sharp stab of loss. This is going to be the 4th time I will have moved in the last year and a half. There is a lot in transition right now in my life and I was hoping I could stick around here for at least an extra few months and deal with it in my own time.

But all good things must come to an end.

I even cried for a minute. I let the emotion flow through me and rise to the surface, bringing whatever it chose to with it. And then it was gone: the feeling of loss, that is. I made some tea, dressed and walked about a mile to my morning meeting. As I walked, the sun poped out from behind the clouds and it was dazzling. And I felt free. And stronger than ever.

February was a month of re-grouping, rejuvenation and preparation. Before I sat down to write this, I scrolled down to my February 5th entry. I hit a low point then: tired, confused, burned out physically and emotionally. Since then, I have regained my focus and my vitality. If I were a mountain climber, let's say that back then I slid and kept sliding, until I hit a ledge. I got back my breath, my courage and my determination, started climbing again – faster and faster – and in doing so, overshot the spot I had been before I started the fall. And now, new heights await.

Right now as I am typing this, the sunset is painting some clouds burgundy. There is also blue and violet in the mix. Dark gray, like winter and loss. Light pink and fluffy white for hope and cozy moments to be snatched here and there. The butt of my jeans is damp because my bike's seat got wet from the rain, as I sat in the coffeeshop brainstorming with my videographer.

All good things come to an end, but I know now that for everything that's lost, there's something to be found. A coccoon is a safe and comfortable place to be, but eventually it is time to break free and fly.

March will be a brilliant adventure.